Shock horror! My mother is an L.B. Addict!!

With my mother being an LB addict and my father not being able to get away from 'Ultimate Soccer Manager' I expect you all to be very sorry for me. (Awww.) However loving ladybirds is quite good for my mum as when she goes out to face the world of car boot sales she confronts her fears of hay fever. Then again if she comes back with nothing but a 'Peter and Jane' Millionth edition Karen spends the rest of her day in bed (Not with the book).

It's also quite good to give Karen something to do when there are no car boots on and the shops are closed as she can write another chapter of Car boot meditations. Instead of getting me to do the dreaded thing of "Tidy your room Alban, now" I reply with a swift "How's the web site doing" and off she goes. Drawback, I can't play computer games. Plus I was toght how to rite reed and spell wif them.

Recently I went to a church hall with Karen to see if there were any books. There wasn't a single book. And Karen felt obliged to buy 1 or 2 (more like 9 or 10) cakes before she remembered to post a letter. So I stood outside for ten minutes holding some cakes and looking like a madman waiting for Karen to post a letter round the corner. Later, I found out that Karen had met a second hand shop owner who had some 'birds in stock that Karen wanted to see.

But like Michael Palin and John Cleese sang 'Always look on the bright side of life' as I did all the graphic design of the website (ŠAlban Dickson and co.).

I sometimes get embarrassed like the time when I went to my golf lesson, my Dad played a round with my grandfather and Karen went car booting. However Karen forgot her house keys so came up to me during my golf lesson and asked where Alastair was I replied "On the course" so Karen ran on the golf course after them and second time lucky she found the right people after interrupting Mr.Smith and Mr. Black's game - they were wearing similer clothes. Mum's never lived that down yet.

Sometimes I get bored to death by these books. For example the time that Karen was excited about out-anoraking an anorak (i.e. head librarian.) And the time she came home shouting, 'Oh goody, a fifth edition of outside Blue pastures with Father Mac' or something like that, I have a pretty bad memory.

With my father up to midnight playing U.S.M. and my cat obsessed with 'chicken' you wonder who the only person in my family is without an obsession. Well I'm off to play with Lego for a few hours now. . . . .

By Alban Dickson, aged 11 ˝

Sad isn't it ...

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